I won’t be ignored

As I freelance, I often have to wait for clients to get back to me on things, like a new assignment, a reply on whether they want to hire me, their feedback on my work, etc. But sometimes, I wait…and I don’t hear back.

That’s when the song “Faint” by Linkin Park blares in my head—and in particular, this iconic line that Chester Bennington screams: “I WON’T BE IGNORED”.

So, the next step is to follow up. Here’s how I do it.

Step 1: Remind myself to follow up

I can’t follow up on a task if I’ve forgotten about it. So, right after messaging my client, I set a reminder for myself to revisit the conversation 3 days or a week later, depending on what I think is a reasonable period.

The exact reminder mechanism differs from platform to platform. If I’d sent an email, I use Gmail’s snooze feature. For Slack messages, I use Slack’s reminder feature. And for other platforms that don’t have reminder features, I add a new task to my to-do list.

I set these reminders even for conversations with people who usually reply promptly. Because you never know: they might get busy with other things and let the ball drop.

Step 2: Send the follow-up message

Let’s say it’s now 3 or 7 days later, and you want to send a follow-up message. What should the message say?

I typically use a casual, friendly line like “Following up on this!” But I recently stumbled upon an X thread sharing alternative openers, which I thought might be useful and have started testing. Feel free to try them yourself (and let me know how they work for you):

A client ghosted me for 3 straight weeks.

I sent him three “Any updates?” emails. Crickets.

Then, I changed my approach. I sent a 1-sentence email using a specific psychological trigger.

He replied in 4 minutes.👇

— Jason (@Jasoncoderx) July 26, 2026

And where appropriate, I introduce FOMO in my follow-up message to encourage the other person to reply sooner.

This works especially well when a client has shown interest in hiring me, but they’re taking some time to send the agreement or a new assignment. In this case, I’ll (honestly) say that my schedule is filling up, and so I want to know if I should set aside time to work on their projects.

Step 3: Repeat steps 1 and 2 as needed

Best-case scenario after I send my follow-up message: the client replies quickly. But if they don’t, I continue to follow up as per step 1 (setting a reminder to follow up) and step 2 (sending the follow-up message).

The number of follow-up messages I send depends on factors like how interested and available I am for the opportunity. But if I’ve sent a couple of follow-ups and still haven’t gotten a response, I use my tool of last resort: asking a no-oriented question about whether they’re still interested in the collaboration.

I got this tactic from “Never Split the Difference”, a book about negotiation written by Chris Voss. It works by asking a question that might get the other person to instinctively answer “no”, which often feels easier and less commitment-heavy than saying “yes”.

For example, instead of saying “Are you still interested in the collaboration?” (where you hope they say “yes”), you could say:

“Are you no longer interested in the collaboration?”

And the other person, upon seeing your question, might feel an urge to respond with denial, plus share what’s blocking them from continuing.

In fact, this is exactly what happened when I followed up with a contact recently:

(My follow-up messages were spaced 1 week apart in line with how I set my internal follow-up reminders to go off 1 week later. And looking back at my messages, saying “following up” 3 times really seems weak. I’m going to improve on this for future follow-ups.)

Don’t take silence personally

Despite the angsty “I won’t be ignored” song lyric that might play in my head, I don’t take it personally if someone is slow to respond to my message or doesn’t respond at all.

Sometimes, despite my best efforts, the client chooses not to continue for reasons beyond my control. And I might not ever find out what led to that decision.

But there’s no point trying to revive an opportunity that’s dead in the water. If all the factors align in the future, the opportunity might just present itself again. But if it doesn’t, well, there are always others to pursue (and follow up on).

More freelancer news

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